This weekend’s movie rant centers on Gone Baby Gone, the directorial debut for Ben Affleck.  Now, the worst thing about with this movie is that Ben Affleck’s name is attached to it.  Since there is a God, he’s behind the cameras, not in front of them.  Since that God hates me, Affleck decided to cast his younger brother, Casey Affleck, in the leading role of Patrick Kenzie, a private investigator hired by some folks to find their missing 4-year old niece.

Not surprisingly, since this is an Afflect flick, the movie is set in Boston.  Fortunately, I had the chance of visiting Boston for the first time a month ago.  Otherwise, after watching this film, I would have assumed that everyone who lived in Boston was either: #1) poor, #2) an asshole, #3) crooked, or #4) ugly as all hell.  The film is bombarded with seemingly random candid shots of “regular” Bostonians who are just living out their pathetic lives in absolute squalor.  I couldn’t tell if these people were extras or carnies.

By the end of the film, there is a little blood on everyone’s hands.  One by one, many of the characters are found to have taken part in the kidnapping of the young girl…a revelation that forces the viewer to dislike almost everyone.  Also, by the end of the film, the viewer must face the same ethical/moral dilemma as Kenzie, whether to remove the kidnapped child from what seemingly is an ideal life with the kidnappers or return her to the shithole that was her life with her mother.

The good:

- The climatic dilemma.  The ending sparks debate as to whether Kenzie made the correct choice.  The ending also is structured so that there is no clear right choice.

- The acting is sound, despite having an Affleck in the cast.  Morgan Freeman co-stars and I practically jizz whenever he’s on screen, so that’s a bonus.

The bad:

- Twists.  The film gets a little too cutesy with all of the twists and turns in the investigation.  There are too many conspiracies and too many people involved in the kidnapping plot.  By the end of the film, you no longer care who is responsible…you just want everyone to burn.

- Visually unappealing.  I’ve never wanted to be blind so much in my life.  The film is littered (see above) with tons of unattractive people.  Amy Madigan has aged 50 years in the last 5.  Bostonians are portrayed as dreary, sad people.

All in all, I would cautiously recommend this film.  There is enough suspense to keep your attention.  I missed about 20 minutes of the film b/c Netflix decided to send me a DVD that somebody apparently decided to shit on just before sending it to me.

6 out of 10 California Rolls